Clear Your Energy

I have no idea if I'm an empath but the first time I ever heard someone talk about what that was - I immediately thought, "oh my God - this would make so much sense!" My mom always told me I was too sensitive but I always chalked it up to being the black sheep in our family and being so deeply hurt by 1) my dad's 'inability to love me' 2) my mom's KNOWING how bad our relationship was, being completely unhappy herself, and using that excuse of not leaving him because she didn't want to raise kids in tht kind of situation..... For the record, if any mother's or father's see this and happen to be in a situation where they don't know if they should stay or go - I will never forget my mom venting to me about dad when I was around 6 years old this one night when we were grocery shopping together - (I was the younger of 2 daughters, the more outgoing one that my parents viewed as the one who didn't need to be sheltered from life like my shy sister) - and I remember getting so excited because I actually believed there was reason to have hope in my question... And I asked my mom if we could leave. I told her I would be HAPPY on the side of the street, in a cardboard box, as long as it was just us. And I fucking meant it. I had so much hope in my heart that hearing that would give my mom the PERMISSION to walk away. She didn't file divorce for about another 15 years .... And yesterday was literally the 7th year anniversary since the day she committed suicide. Don't EVER force another human being to suffer through YOUR PAST and YOUR PARTNER'S PAST, all while creating a TRAUMATIC journey they will have to call their own. They don't have the freedom, the choice, or the defenses... I personally believe that's exactly how our society has gotten to where it is. If you've lived it, you know how horrible that was ... Even one awful night is enough for a kid - they will never feel the same around the people involved in that experience. Sorry..... Okay. I'm done ranting.

Wednesday Feb 26, 2020

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